To kick off our brand-new, 4-week series called Love, Sex, & Dating, we are diving into what the Bible says in Song of Solomon. This is an Old Testament book of Hebrew love poetry written by a young King Solomon around the year 965 BC chronicling a duet about his love story with his bride.
In Song of Solomon 1, we’re immediately caught off guard by the unexpected boldness of Solomon’s wife! In this ancient romance, the WOMAN was the initiator. Beyond wine and perfume, she praises Solomon for his character – and this is important, because this book shows us how their romance moves from the inside-out… from the spiritual, to the emotional, and then finally, the physical.
Godly Love Is Intoxicating!
In this day and age, we err on the side of cynicism when it comes to Love, Sex, & Dating… but the truth is OUR GOD designed romance! Understand, Song of Solomon is an idealized picture of the intimate relationship between Solomon and his wife… they’re in the honeymoon stage. But as the book progresses, we’re actually given helpful flashbacks that tell the story of how their relationship got started… and offer insight into modern romance!
She Was Insecure About Her Appearance
In verse 5, we see Solomon’s would-be bride is actually insecure because she was dark-skinned. This description means she was a working-class woman and her appearance didn’t match what the culture deemed beautiful. Now, any woman today can relate to this. In the Western, “Swipe Right” culture we live in, this idea that physical appearance is the #1 priority in relationships completely misses the spiritual heart and soul of godly romance. However, in her insecurities, Solomon looked beneath the surface to her spiritual soul, to praise her character.
He Is Drawn To Her Character
tiWhen Solomon met his bride, she was a peasant girl who served faithfully in the fields of the king to provide for her family. He was attracted to a powerful picture of a woman with character instead of the ideal picture of a beautiful woman. I realize this may sound archaic, but the truth is, God invented love and sex… Our culture simply pretends it isn’t something sacred or spiritual – something to be protected.
Understand this: If you are dating, right now you are laying the foundation on which your marriage will stand or fall… and if you are choosing to sin together, you are demonstrating that you cannot be trusted before the real pressure of marriage begins. You either HONOR God together, or SIN together: The choice is yours. Will you choose to prioritize character like Solomon?
Now, if you are married, I have homework for you: Go home tonight, and before you go to sleep, tell your partner one aspect of their character that you find intoxicating! If you’re dating or engaged, ask yourself this: What is it about your partner’s spiritual character that makes you want to be with them?
Last, for all our singles: What exactly are you looking for in a potential mate? What are the BEAUTY MARKS of the SOUL that you’re looking for? When we view prospective partners or our spouses with God’s glasses and see what he sees – truly value what he values – that’s when character comes first.